The Big Holiday Debrief Episode: What Went Well and What Didn’t [Episode 18]

Welcome to the Holiday Head Start Podcast, where we get intentional about keeping overwhelmed to the curb and bringing the joy back to your holidays and everyday. I’m Heidi and I’m Emily. We’re two sisters and former elementary schoolers. who’ve taken the simple strategies and practical tips we mastered in the classroom and put them to work in our personal lives.

And we’re here to help you do the same. Join us each week as we share how, with a little planning and a little prep, you can ensure that the days that make life special don’t become the days that make you stressed. You can check out the show notes at theholidayheadstart. com Ready to get a head start on your holidays?

Let’s go!

[00:00:53] Emily: Hey friends! Can you believe we did it? Christmas is behind us and we’re off and running into the new year.

[00:01:01] Heidi: But before we get too far into January, we want to reflect on the season behind us so that we can guide our steps going forward this year.

[00:01:09] Emily: But first! We need to share a tradition spotlight. Traditions are an important tool in building a healthy, happy, connected life. This week, we have a tradition for celebrating Lunar New Year. So tell us about this, Heidi.

[00:01:26] Heidi: This year, Lunar New Year starts on January 29th and 2025 is the year of the snake. Did you know that, Emily?

[00:01:34] Emily: I did not.

[00:01:35] Heidi: I didn’t either. That was news to me. So for billions of people in East Asia, this is the biggest celebration of the year. If you are of Asian descent, you might already have lots of special traditions that you do for this holiday.

But if you don’t have Asian ancestry, this can be a great opportunity to learn about a different part of the world and their cultural celebrations. Last year, Emily and I ordered a box from Bo and Mai, and it was a fun way to learn about this new holiday.

[00:02:03] Emily: Yeah, Bo and Mai was started by a mom looking to connect her daughters to their Vietnamese and Chinese roots. So we will link to their site in the show notes. They have bundles of activities, games, and kid crafts.

[00:02:16] Heidi: And this isn’t an ad. We just really enjoyed their products. Last year we got the togetherness box, I think. And it was really fun. It had lots of cultural information, some decorations and fun activities that we could do with Emily’s kids.

[00:02:30] Emily: There are also lots of wonderful picture books for the Lunar New Year. Ruby’s Chinese New Year is one of my favorites, but we’ll put a link in the show notes to a list of books compiled by the New York Public Library. We’d love to hear how you celebrate Lunar New Year. Come join us on Instagram at the holiday headstart.

[00:02:49] Heidi: Now, this might be a little bit of a quirky side of me, but I love reflecting. I think it’s the perfectionist in me. It’s a good way to feed that perfectionist. But today I’m a little bit nervous to be doing this so publicly.

[00:03:04] Emily: Yeah, we’re kind of like pulling back the curtain today to let you in on the sort of post holiday conversations that Heidi and I usually have behind the scenes and maybe hearing us will help you as you reflect on your holiday.

[00:03:17] Heidi: If you have the Holiday Head Start Reflection Journal, there are the five R’s of reflection. First, we remember by recording our favorite memories. Then we reflect on what went well and what didn’t go well. We use those reflections for our third R, which is to resolve, where we take what we have learned and we make resolutions to carry into our future holidays.

[00:03:40] Emily: And then we can talk about our fourth R, which is resetting. Getting back to normal life after the holidays is a lot of work.

[00:03:48] Heidi: And then our fifth R is responses. While Christmas is still fresh, schedule a time to chat with your loved ones about their favorite parts of the holidays. There’s a form for you to record all of this in the journal so that you will have this handy so that you can reflect on their input to plan your upcoming holiday events.

[00:04:07] Emily: Yeah, this step can be so helpful. If you find out that no one cares about watching Miracle on 34th Street or your annual ice skating trip, it can be a sign to revamp or retire those traditions.

[00:04:20] Heidi: Well, we’re just going to set all of that aside for another day to say Emily and I are diving into our reflections and our resolutions.

In the reflection journal, there are pages for each of the eight areas of intention, your holiday vision, planning relationships, home, holiday experiences, gifts, and spending spirituality and personal wellbeing. I promise it’s not as overwhelming as it sounds. And I have never answered all of the questions that are in this reflection journal,

[00:04:49] Emily: Yeah, if you open it up and see all of those questions, like don’t panic. It’s not an assignment. You don’t have to answer all of them.

[00:04:57] Heidi: No, but I think it’s important that we have them because some years I have found some questions so helpful and insightful and some years I was just like, eh, nah, like that doesn’t even register with what happened. So it’s important to just pick and choose what is useful for you. And that’s what we’ve done today.

We picked and choosed, chosen some questions from those areas to talk about.

[00:05:19] Emily: Hopefully as we go through our reflections, it will inspire you with some ideas of what you can do to streamline your own holiday plans.

So Heidi, why don’t you kick us off with the first question?

[00:05:30] Heidi: Well, we wanted to start with some happy memories. So Emily, what was the highlight of the season for you or what memories will you treasure?

[00:05:37] Emily: I mean, honestly, all of the memories were really great and wonderful this year, but I think the highlight for me, and something that was special for this year, was that my son and I were working on the Home Alone. Lego set for the whole month. And this is a set I’ve been wanting to buy for a couple of years.

So that made it like even more exciting to finally have. And my son was so excited to do it. And it’s formatted in 24 bags so that you can do a bag every day. We. Definitely fell behind, but it was just really fun to have that going throughout the whole month and have that one on one time with him, my middle child and my only boy.

So I was really happy to have that time with him and it will be a really happy memory of 2024. What was your highlight of the season, Heidi, or treasured memory?

[00:06:28] Heidi: Well, it’s really hard to pick just one. I think it was such a special month, uh, but something that I thought that was really fun was getting to go to a concert with you, Emily. We got to go see Leslie Odom Jr. ‘s Christmas concert and that was a fun memory because it’s not something we’ve ever done before.

[00:06:46] Emily: No, that was really fun to do, like something totally different for us.

[00:06:50] Heidi: yeah, so it was just a special evening to get to go listen to amazing music and just have that fun, special Christmas, fun feeling

[00:07:00] Emily: Yeah, I loved that.

Okay. So when it comes to vision, where did your efforts make the highest contribution to your holiday, Heidi?

[00:07:10] Heidi: Well, that sounds like a really lofty question and it’s going to have a very unlofty answer. I think something that really helped with our holiday planning was I made a bin for each of our different events and that has just been so useful. Like when it started, I would just have my Christmas bins and so everything was in it.

Some of it was organized. Some of it wasn’t. And over the years it got to be like, okay, well, you know, decoration bins are separate from activity bins. And then the past couple of years, I’ve just really focused. I got smaller bins. And have everything I need for one activity in a bin. So I can just pull that bin out before the activity, everything I need is in there, everything it’s packed up and then it can get put away.

It’s made it so much easier to shift between so many activities that we do in a month.

[00:08:03] Emily: Yeah, I love that idea. I need to figure out a place where I have room for some bins like that because yeah, my stuff tends to be spread out among all the holiday bins and all the Christmas bins and it makes it a real pain when you need something.

[00:08:18] Heidi: I got so attached to my, the specific style of bin. I paid like 36 bucks for two of them

[00:08:24] Emily: Oh

[00:08:25] Heidi: they were closing up. They’re not selling these anymore. I Well, I have to have them because it’s the perfect size for what I need, so, but I got them. I should have bought more now

[00:08:34] Emily: I know we can never add anything new because you won’t

[00:08:37] Heidi: I know.

[00:08:37] Emily: the right bins for it.

[00:08:40] Heidi: Okay. And what about you? Which of your efforts made the highest contribution to your holiday?

[00:08:44] Emily: Well, I feel like a lot of my planning did not come to fruition this year in the way I wanted it to, but something. That I did put effort into last year that I do think made a difference Was learning what my holiday What did we call it personality type is what did we call my holiday profile?

I felt like that was illuminating to realize what I Love about the holidays and what makes it feel like the holidays to me like Uh, knowing that I love the holidays to feel really abundant and that I want like a full sensory experience Made me understand more during the holiday season like what I needed so that when it was a busy day Where i’m running my kids around i’m going this does not even feel like christmas Where I could lean into things that would make it still feel Christmassy Does that make sense?

[00:09:39] Heidi: Yeah. I love that because that was definitely our, because that was definitely my hope with sharing this because that’s what it does for me, but you never know how well that will translate to anyone else. So I’d love to hear that that has been useful for you.

And if you don’t know your profile, you can find out more about it at quiz dot the holiday headstart. com and there will be a link to it in the show notes.

Okay. Emily, let’s talk about planning. What did you learn about planning and preparing this year?

[00:10:05] Emily: Well, I think my big revelation when I, when it was post Christmas and I was looking back on what didn’t happen the way I wanted it to, despite all of the planning I had done, was realizing that I need to get specific. Like, I can’t just say, I want to put my decorations up early. I need to define. What that is and when it’s gonna happen if I don’t if I don’t schedule a time for something to happen Then it’s just not gonna happen and it is too easy to be like, well, I’ll deal with that whenever Because and things that can happen whenever Never happen is what I’m realizing.

So I would say that’s the the biggest thing. I’m realizing would make the Hopefully the biggest difference next year was just getting actually putting into my calendar when I’m going to do the things that need to get done. And then also I need to start earlier because I’m going to talk more about that later in the episode, I think, but I’ve got to start earlier.

And then also I need to plan for the unexpected, which was in my household was three kids getting the tummy bugs, but not at the same time. So it was basically like getting hit with this tummy bug. Three different times in December, which was a real bummer for everyone involved. I will thank my lucky stars that it didn’t take me down too.

So at least that’s the silver lining, but I need, I obviously you can’t fully plan for something like that, but maybe we just need to be more prepared that there will be something unexpected that comes up in December. I mean, it’s, it’s pretty much of a safe guess that one of my kids will at least get sick with something in December.

So if I plan for that, because we had to like shift things around in the schedule, which was already a tight schedule. I don’t know exactly how you plan for the unexpected, but I think I just need to be aware, have it on my radar that something’s probably going to disrupt this month. Be, be ready for it.

[00:12:02] Heidi: Yeah. I don’t know what the answer is there, but I think at least knowing it’s on the horizon, Was it forewarned as forearmed at least?

[00:12:10] Emily: Yes. Maybe it’s putting in makeup activity days into the schedule of like, okay, if something earlier in the month gets canceled, we could do it on this day or this day or this day. Cause we were kind of scrambling to figure that out. We did make it work in the end of course, but what did you learn about planning and preparing this year, Heidi?

[00:12:30] Heidi: I think a big thing for me is just Underestimating the time that I need to recover after an activity. I sound like I’m 80 years old these, you know, putting into a lot of effort into something Takes energy and it wipes me out.

[00:12:45] Emily: Mm hmm.

[00:12:46] Heidi: And then I just underestimate my ability to bounce back and move on from that.

I think losing that extra week between Thanksgiving and December 1st, this year, really just started me off on my back foot because I went from Thanksgiving on the Thursday and then. Monday is what? Monday was December 1st. So it was like, Oh, I am barely, I’m still washing dishes. I’ve got cornucopias still up, but now I feel like the clock is ticking and I’m behind,

[00:13:15] Emily: Yep.

[00:13:16] Heidi: but it just, Like my big plans for taking that Friday and Saturday after Thanksgiving to start Christmas mode, you know, officially flip the switch on that.

It just didn’t happen cause I was too tired.

[00:13:28] Emily: Right, and the first was actually Sunday, so we had so little time between when December starts and Thanksgiving this year. And every one of my friends that I’ve talked to hasn’t put that time on. together in their mind yet, either of like, everyone’s been saying kind of the same thing of like, Oh man, it felt like we just didn’t have very much time or I’m not ready to take my decorations down yet.

There were, it just didn’t really get to enjoy it. I’m like, yeah, we lost a whole week of Christmas that we normally would have, or at least a week to get ready for Christmas. So I feel like that made a big difference this year.

[00:14:03] Heidi: Yeah. At a time when minutes matter, losing a whole week of that

[00:14:07] Emily: Yes. Yes, if you love Christmas, then like having a week less of the season is a big change.

[00:14:14] Heidi: Yeah. And I don’t know what the solution is because I also, I love, I love my Thanksgiving decorations. I love having that separate space for that. So I don’t necessarily, part of me is like, well, I’ll just. Well, I did put the tree up earlier this year, so I feel like I get a gold star for that. I didn’t decorate because I didn’t want us to be eating our turkey with peppermint Santa Claus’s on the tree.

[00:14:36] Emily: I know. That is the thing I can’t quite figure out the answer to, because I kind of feel the same way. I haven’t decorated for Thanksgiving in a long time because of that. Because it’s like, well, I need to start the Christmas stuff, um, so why even put up Thanksgiving? I don’t know. I don’t know what the answer is.

Maybe there’s a way to have some combo of both, but.

[00:14:56] Heidi: yeah,

[00:14:57] Emily: I don’t know what it is.

[00:14:58] Heidi: I don’t know what it is either. If anyone knows what it is, please tell us the answer.

Okay, Emily, looking at experiences, which aspects of the season caused you the most stress, even though you enjoy them or find them necessary?

[00:15:10] Emily: Well, it’s decorating because it’s the thing that gives me the biggest impact when it’s up. I love to walk into my house and have like all my Christmas decor up, it’s the thing I hate doing the most. And so I, I tend to put off doing it. I don’t. I don’t enjoy the process, it’s just, it’s such a hassle, but I also really love it when it’s up.

[00:15:36] Heidi: Yeah. Yes. A hundred percent. I co sign all of that. I could say all of that myself. My tree didn’t get what I would say fully decorated until December 23rd,

[00:15:49] Emily: Yep.

[00:15:50] Heidi: but that was on me. I didn’t want to take the time. Okay. All of the combination of factors that went into this, I like my tree to have a lot of stuff on it. I know this about myself. Uh, I don’t want to take the three hours it’s going to take to do it all in one go. Like I just like early in the month, we just didn’t have the time.

We had a crazy work deadline, sneak out of the woods and pounce on us. So that threw off the first of the month. And I remember getting to like December 12th. I’m being like, okay, this is the make it or break it moment. Cause we’re halfway to Christmas at this point. So either I can get in or I can just bag it.

And I decided, okay, I’m just, I’m just going to take it a little bit at a time. And so I would decorate and like 10, 15 minute bursts. Anytime I like walk past the tree, because that’s all I felt like I could give to the job. Now, did that make it take 500 times longer than it needed to? Yes. But I, I was in a big spiral about it until I thought.

I either have to stop or I have to figure out a way to reframe it. And I’m actually quite proud of myself for recognizing I was doing it and finding a way to like pull myself back.

[00:17:00] Emily: Oh yeah, because I just did the spiraling part, I didn’t figure out a way to pull back.

[00:17:05] Heidi: Well, I just decided that like, I want to do Christmasy things every day. What is more Christmasy than decorating the tree? Right. So I’m just looking at this as like 10 minutes of just having a little Christmas moment every day with, you know, taking some time, hanging some red and white ornaments on my tree.

And it actually, it did help a lot with that anxiety spiral. Now I also had to have Emily’s kids come over in the last minute and I just had to say, everyone grab ornaments and put them anywhere there’s a spot,

[00:17:35] Emily: that’s what I do at my house Which is why my tree always looks a mess because it’s like i’m just gonna let the kids do it So the middle is very well decorated and then the top and the bottom not so much

[00:17:45] Heidi: So that, you know, that has charm where you got, you know, you know, your little people been helping you.

[00:17:50] Emily: Yes. Well, I wonder if next year If you make a plan for when you want to have the tree up but not decorated before thanksgiving And then just have it in your schedule that you’re going to have like two or three times a day that you spend 10 minutes putting stuff on it.

And maybe that would just like get the ball rolling early. And I do think it’s somewhat easier to work on if you’re like, I’m only going to do it for 10 minutes. That’s easy. I can do 10 minutes,

[00:18:15] Heidi: yes.

[00:18:16] Emily: you know? And once you get into it, you might be like, well, I can keep going. This is fine. I do also find with decorating that I.

I feel like it’s worse than it is. So once I actually do it, I’m like, all right, that’s not that bad. But I think next year I’m going to do it where I have set days for certain things. So instead of like one day where all the Christmas stuff comes out and then it’s chaos and there’s bins everywhere and it’s just like so much, I think I’m going to have set days of like, here’s the day we get out all the Christmas books and change out all the books on the bookshelf to Christmas I have a plethora of those. And then a day where we put up the glitter houses and things like that. And if I just scheduled those out, then we only have to bring in those bins at one time.

[00:18:59] Heidi: That’s a

[00:18:59] Emily: it’d be less overwhelming. And we can like ease into it instead of like, it is decorating day. I don’t enjoy that.

I think some people probably do, but I do not.

[00:19:09] Heidi: No, I think that’s, that’s part of the overwhelm. And I also feel like there are 50 other tasks that have to be done. We’re decorating is like, I could do it tomorrow. I could do it today. I could do, you know, where, where. Yeah, it just makes it tricky to feel like I can give it the time it needs. One thing I’m going to try this year.

So most of my decorations can fit in one big bin. And I think I can fit that in my front hall closet. So having that already in the house. It’s just one less step than having to like go figure out wherever I shoved it in the garage last January and then out in the cold and hauling it up the steps and in the house.

Cause I think if it’s already in the house, like that’s just one less step. So hopefully, I guess we’ll see. Stay

[00:19:55] Emily: I was, I was resistant to putting my Christmas stuff into the garage for that reason. I had all of my Christmas stuff under the stairs in my house. And then it was too much to fit in there. So that it made more sense to just have like, A whole shelf in the garage that’s only Christmas stuff.

And I had my garage reorganized by professionals last year, so I can easily get to it. It’s all well labeled and still it’s just like, Oh, but it’s out in the

[00:20:21] Heidi: Yep.

[00:20:21] Emily: It’s so cold.

[00:20:23] Heidi: You got to make it easier to do the right thing. I learned that lesson over and over.

[00:20:28] Emily: Well, okay. So spendings next. What is your plan for saving for Christmas this year?

[00:20:34] Heidi: I just need to be more proactive about it. I really need to sit down and make an actual budget based on my spending instead of just what I imagine. I think I spent,

[00:20:44] Emily: I’m too scared to know.

[00:20:45] Heidi: I know that is the downside, but I, I tried to make notes in my phone as I went this month of like how much I spent here and how much the Christmas Eve cake cost So I can factor because all that stuff, none of that stuff was in my plans of, you know, going by world market for one thing and spending a hundred dollars.

Like I hadn’t factored that in.

[00:21:05] Emily: Yes. Uh, it’s true. And it’s the same for me. I just want to actually be saving for it instead of being like, oh, I’ll figure it out when it happens. I’ll, if I spend more than I expected to, it’s fine, I’ll figure it out. That is not going to work anymore. That plan, that plan to not have a plan is not going to work anymore, so I think this year, and I also I also want to be able to Spend again, because Christmas is like, it’s our super bowl.

It’s, it’s the thing we love the most. I want to be able to spend without guilt. And so I need to put money aside and buy gift cards at the stores I regularly shop at and all of those things that in December I can shop without any guilt. That’s my plan.

[00:21:51] Heidi: that would be, that would be a good feeling for me too. So I get that. Well, we’ll have to hold each other accountable on that one.

[00:21:57] Emily: Yeah. That sounded, that sounded like I didn’t really mean it, but, but I do mean it. We’re going to be better this year.

[00:22:04] Heidi: Yeah, I think we, I don’t know that we have a choice.

[00:22:07] Emily: No, we have to be better this year.

[00:22:10] Heidi: All right. So looking at spirituality, how could next year’s holidays more closely reflect your values? Emily?

[00:22:16] Emily: Well, I do think for me that I didn’t have a plan for how I was really going to incorporate spirituality even though in the past I have done certain things and none of it really happened this year. So we’ve had like the little giving manger in the past where the kids put in a piece of straw every time they do an act of service during the month.

Um, but we didn’t. The baby Jesus got separated from the manger. And so we, right. So we couldn’t, we were, I was nervous to put out the manger in case I couldn’t find the baby Jesus. Cause that would be very anticlimactic. So we didn’t even do that this year. And I like to do like daily devotional with myself just personally and with the kids.

And I had bought a daily. Advent devotional, that has like on a big poster pad and you rip off a poster every day to read the next one. And I mean, the way that I got completely derailed on that, because I’m like, I need to find some hooks to hang this up. And then it was like, I ordered some hooks, but they came and I don’t know where I put them.

So then I had to order some more hooks and literally by the time I got it up, I think it was like December 13th. And I was like, well, this is crazy. I don’t want to waste this now and just rip off half of it because I’m starting it late. So I actually just abandoned that completely. I’m putting it away for next year with the hooks.

[00:23:39] Heidi: Oh, smart.

[00:23:40] Emily: So we’re good to go. So Basically, I just failed to plan, and so I need to plan better. And also, we did last year, in several of the recent years, we have done what we call the Shepherd’s Dinner, growing up we called it a Bethlehem Supper, where we, we talk about The birth of Christ, and we decided to shift that this year and do it at a different time of the year.

I think we’re going to do it around Easter, but I didn’t really realize until it was like Christmas Eve that like, I didn’t do any of that. Like with my kids, we didn’t read the Christmas story together. Like just kind of was off my game a little because I think I was just like counting that as having done the Christmas story.

I don’t know. I feel like I fell short in this area and I would like to rectify it. But I don’t know exactly how.

[00:24:31] Heidi: Yeah. Not doing the shepherd’s supper. Really? I was unprepared for how much that threw me off on the one hand. It was great because I hadn’t realized like that particular dinner takes a lot of effort.

[00:24:43] Emily: Yes. And that’s something that you host for the family,

[00:24:45] Heidi: So it was really nice not to have that. And I am looking forward to having something more meaningful around Easter cause we don’t have a lot of Easter traditions.

I think that would fit well. But then like part of that was the kids would set up my nativity and I never even put my nativity out cause I

[00:25:02] Emily: I, I put out my nicest big nativity this year for the first time in years because it had been lost in the garage.

[00:25:10] Heidi: Oh,

[00:25:10] Emily: And so once the garage got reorganized this year, the nativity was found again. So we did put that up. I will say that. And the kids were excited to do that. So I mean, we got that done, but.

[00:25:21] Heidi: something,

[00:25:22] Emily: Yeah. And, and this might not be important to everyone who’s listening. Like if that, if this isn’t important to your holidays, that’s totally fine. But it is important to us though, then we need to make a plan for. Being better next year. I think I, I also really want to do better about Incorporating more service for my kids in the month than I did this year the kid schools do like sock drives, but I was off my game So I didn’t have any ordered in time for them to donate just things like that Just I need to be prepared in advance because I know they’re always going to do that So you need to have it in the plans

[00:25:57] Heidi: well, it’s good to know that that’s coming. So it’s not a surprise every year, at least that’s something you can factor in. And we did, we did do a little bit. I, when I take the kids Christmas shopping, this year I added, I had bought some 5 gift cards and we were at Target and I like gave them each a mission to find someone at Target to give their gift card to.

And so that was a really special experience. So I do feel like we, you know, we got a little bit of. service, even if it wasn’t as much as we wanted.

Spiritual gifts and recognizing the spiritual gifts in each other. I thought that was really beautiful and powerful. So it wasn’t perfect, but we still, we met that goal. I think.

[00:26:39] Emily: Yes. It’s just easier to point out all the ways where we fall short because that’s, that’s what immediately comes to mind, but

[00:26:45] Heidi: We’re very good at that.

I am thinking of some kind of service we could do. So I’m leaning toward maybe like assembling birthday bags that you can donate to the food bank that have like cake mix and party supplies and stuff.

[00:27:00] Emily: Mm hmm.

[00:27:01] Heidi: some ideas because I thought that might be something we could stock up on all year

[00:27:05] Emily: Oh, I like that

[00:27:06] Heidi: and then just assemble them. But I don’t know. I don’t know if we want to add that to Christmas Eve. That might be too much.

[00:27:12] Emily: Yeah, but we could probably do it Attached to something else earlier in the month, maybe

[00:27:17] Heidi: Yeah, I’m thinking I might need some kind of December 1st early in the month activity For you guys to come over just to like move me toward getting things going

[00:27:28] Emily: Well, that’s

[00:27:28] Heidi: that had been the shepherd’s supper But now it was like, okay Well, if they’re coming over then we can incorporate like setting up the nativity even if we’re not doing the full Big supper.

[00:27:37] Emily: Yeah.

[00:27:39] Heidi: just some odds and ends. I can use my Christmas dishes. You know, all the important things.

[00:27:43] Emily: Yes for sure Or there’s that we have a refugee group here in Utah that we like to do things where We put together backpacks of supplies for them in the summer for back to school. And I know they have like kits that you can put together for a family for the holidays that incorporates like a grocery gift card and some other supplies for them.

That could be something that could be fun too. So we should pick one. We should put that into our holidays that we have a day where we decide what our service is going to be so that we can start planning the shopping for it.

[00:28:16] Heidi: Yes. That’s a good idea.

[00:28:18] Emily: Well, how did you practice self care during the holiday hustle and bustle, Heidi?

[00:28:23] Heidi: One thing that I really, I was militant about was getting my daily Luminette glasses in first thing every morning.

[00:28:30] Emily: Mm hmm.

[00:28:31] Heidi: Uh, that has made The biggest difference to my health and wellbeing more than anything I have ever done,

[00:28:38] Emily: Yeah, for

[00:28:39] Heidi: because I can suddenly sleep.

[00:28:41] Emily: Mm hmm.

[00:28:42] Heidi: What it is, for your circadian rhythms, it’s important to get bright light in your eyes first thing in the morning for like 30 minutes.

And that’s really hard to do if you have a busy morning, or you just don’t like to hop up out of bed and go out into the sun. So these glasses replicate that experience. And suddenly I can sleep at night, like before I would be up three, four times a night, sometimes not even really falling asleep till like four in the morning.

But these glasses have made such a difference. And I feel like I’ve had way better energy all month because I’m actually sleeping.

[00:29:16] Emily: that’s amazing.

[00:29:17] Heidi: that has made the biggest difference. And then I also kept a list on my phone of things I was proud of myself for doing this month, like reframing the tree decorating. Like I was really proud of that and I started keeping a list of like things I was proud of myself for not doing.

Like we had tickets to go to a different show that wasn’t the concert and we bailed on that one day because it was just like, there was too much going on. And part of me is like, Oh, this wasted money.

[00:29:43] Emily: we were really conflicted about it,

[00:29:46] Heidi: But then when I, but I could put out my list, I was like, I’m proud that we said no to that because it just was not supporting our goals,

[00:29:52] Emily: right. And it wasn’t like a holiday show. It was just like part of our regular theater season tickets. There were so many reasons why we were really dreading doing it, and it was so nice to just. have that time to do something else instead.

[00:30:05] Heidi: And I wanted to take donations of the Christmas decorations I was. Getting rid of to the thrift store. And all of a sudden, like I just put it on the, I’m saying no to this because it’s not supporting my bigger goals right now. So I was really proud of myself for that. So

[00:30:20] Emily: I love it.

[00:30:20] Heidi: on the back.

[00:30:22] Emily: I need to have a list like that to appreciate the things I do.

[00:30:27] Heidi: What about you, Emily? How did you practice self care this season?

[00:30:30] Emily: Well, it’s probably easier to tell you all the ways I did not prioritize my well being in

[00:30:34] Heidi: Nope. No, give us a good one.

[00:30:37] Emily: but I will say I have, Really prioritize my health this year out of pure necessity because I was just feeling so terrible And so I actually had a whole bunch of doctor’s appointments for various things in december.

So That was good, you know it again. My schedule was very busy because of it but it meant I was like taking care of myself and doing things I needed to do and The doctor that i’ve been seeing Has been monitoring my labs really closely. So I have been taking all sorts of new supplements because it turned out I had like no Iron or vitamin D or b12 or all the things that make you feel like a human I had like almost none of and so taking those in this recent month has made me feel a lot better More alive.

So I will say that I did was prioritizing my health

[00:31:29] Heidi: Yay, yay.

[00:31:30] Emily: I definitely was staying up too late most nights though. So that was not good But I also I prioritized those sensory experiences I talked about of this is what feels like holiday to me And so doing this is sort of like self care. So I was doing Simmer pots throughout the month I was Listening to holiday music, watching and reading holiday books and movies, and, making sure I had holiday lights around the house that make me happy.

And so I did at least lean into those things that, like, feel kind of like self care to me.

[00:32:04] Heidi: Well, good for you. I love that. We only get one crack at Christmas,

[00:32:08] Emily: I know. Which just makes it feel so high stakes. I don’t, and I don’t like that it feels that way.

[00:32:14] Heidi: but I think you’ve hit on an important point is like figuring out what feels like Christmas to you and making sure that those things are happening, maybe some of the other bigger pieces are getting dropped. Or not necessarily bigger pieces. Maybe other pieces are getting dropped, but if you’re dialed in to what you need specifically, you can make sure that you’re having those moments and that those experiences and the chance to have those Christmassy feelings that you can’t really get in July.

[00:32:39] Emily: Yes, it’s so true.

[00:32:41] Heidi: Emily. So we’re going to wrap up here with our final question. What advice would you give your future self as you move toward another holiday season?

[00:32:50] Emily: Well, I want to tell myself to remember that I never regret doing things early because I just tend to dither in November about how early to put up the tree and decorations. Like, we’ve already, we’ve already talked about that. So, I just need to, get over the idea that I’m breaking some kind of rule if I put things up before Thanksgiving. Because when I wait, then as soon as Thanksgiving ends, I’m like, well, I’m already late.

[00:33:17] Heidi: Yes.

[00:33:19] Emily: So I just, I just got to ignore that rule and put my decor up early because it is the number one thing that stresses me out at Christmas. And it’s also the thing I enjoy the most. And so I know I won’t look back and be sorry that I put it up in the moment.

It might feel a little weird, but once it’s up, I think I’ll be glad it’s up. And looking back, then I’ll be like, Oh man, I got so long to enjoy it. And sort of like this year where it’s like, Oh, I wish I’d had a little longer to enjoy it. So I just don’t think I’m going to regret. putting it up early. I just need to do it.

[00:33:47] Heidi: I say that’s so important. In the education space, there’s a saying that like, there’s no downside to early intervention, you know?

[00:33:54] Emily: There is no downside to early decoration.

[00:33:57] Heidi: Yes.

[00:33:58] Emily: So I’m going to have to like print that on something to remind myself. So true. Well, and the other big thing that the advice I would give myself that this was a huge realization to me this year on top of the like things need to be scheduled on the calendar to get done, not just events, but

to do list items. The other thing would for me that I’ve got to remember this year is that I have to be better about closing the loop. Like this is an all my whole life problem. It’s not just at Christmas, but it was very apparent at Christmas where I start something and I do part of it, but I don’t close the whole loop there.

And so in my mind, it’s done.

[00:34:37] Heidi: yes.

[00:34:38] Emily: then all of a sudden it’s like, Oh no, it’s not done. That is a huge problem for me and was really apparent this year in my Christmas planning and executing of like, Ooh, I thought that was done, but I only just started it. Or, you know, I thought about it and that made me think it was done.

I’ve got to be better about like closing the loop. And when I don’t finish something, making it clear somewhere that it’s not complete and what still needs to be done so that I don’t make the mistakes I’ve made of thinking I’ve done more than I have.

[00:35:13] Heidi: Yeah. That’s a big trap I fall into too. It’s like I order my Christmas cards in September and I still am rushing to get them out the door because in my head the job is done.

[00:35:22] Emily: Yep. Yep.

[00:35:24] Heidi: Oh wait, it is not done. I have to do some work on these. So yeah, I do that too.

[00:35:30] Emily: Yeah. Well, I know if we figure it out this year of how to make sure you close the loop, we’ll, we’ll tell you guys. So what, what advice are you giving a future Heidi?

[00:35:41] Heidi: Well, I do really well on the planning side of things as well. If you’ve listened to this podcast before, you may have noticed, but the actual doing of the things is kind of where it falls apart for me as in, you know, without those open loops. So I would tell my future self to make the advanced prep happen, even if the circumstances aren’t ideal.

So this was something I was like wrestling with all my, I don’t have to have my whole kitchen clean before I can start baking. I don’t have to schedule a whole day to make a bunch of freezer meals. I could just do one in October and it would be putting me ahead. Even if it wasn’t the perfect plan of, Oh, I now have three in the fridge.

You know,

[00:36:21] Emily: Yep.

[00:36:22] Heidi: I can get one thing done for that meal. Even if it’s just roasting Brussels sprouts, I don’t have to do the whole thing. I don’t have to schedule time to do all of my decorations or take down all of my decorations. I can just do a little bit at a time. I can wrap gifts as I go instead of having to wait till December 23rd when I have them all.

[00:36:40] Emily: Oh, yeah, that feels pointed at me because that’s definitely what happened this year. They’re not all here yet.

[00:36:46] Heidi: I just default so easily to all or nothing. And that’s great if the option is all, but so often the option is nothing. So I’m going to just try and work really hard this year to notice when I’m falling into that pattern and then just do something to redirect it.

[00:37:06] Emily: I love that.

Well, that was a fun exercise for us. I have lots of thoughts I need to now get down in my reflection planner. We would love to hear about your post holiday reflections, especially if you used the holiday headstart playbook this year.

So you can connect with us on Instagram at the holiday headstart, and now it’s time for a, get a headstart tip. Each week we leave you with a small actionable tip to help you get a head start on your holiday planning. This week’s get a head start tip is to make a to do list. Can you tell us more about that Heidi?

[00:37:40] Heidi: Well, I love this one. This is actually one of my personal traditions. So every year around New Year’s, and I haven’t done it yet this year, so I need to get on that. I sit down with my journal and I make my to do list for the previous year. This is the list of everything I’ve accomplished this year.

The big stuff, like, you know, we launched a whole new podcast and the little stuff, like I remembered to refill my prescription before it ran out, you know, that way I can look back and say, you know, ta da, look what I did. I started doing this as a way to counter that kind of dragging pull of getting to the end of the year and not having accomplished every goal I had set out to do.

But now this is something that I look forward to doing every year. It’s so affirming and motivating.

[00:38:24] Emily: you can do a to do list every time you need a reminder of how much you actually do. It doesn’t just have to be the end of the year. But one time that’s really helpful is to do this after Christmas. So if you have the holiday headstart playbook, the very first list in section 10 with all the to do lists is a holiday to doll list.

So listing all the tiny little tasks that went into pulling together your celebrations can be a great help when it’s time to start making your to do list for next Christmas.

[00:38:53] Heidi: And this will be so much easier to do while Christmas is still fresh in your mind. You’ll get so much more out of this doing it now than you will trying to do this in October. So you might wanna get started on this in the next week or two, just, you know, a little gentle reminder.

[00:39:07] Emily: Yes, think how great it will be to have all of this already written down so that when you’re diving into the holiday prep next fall, the essential task of knowing what you need to do is already written down for you.

[00:39:18] Heidi: Okay, Emily, let’s share what we are working on this week as a way to keep ourselves accountable and to give you some ideas of what you can do in advance. We’re sharing what we’re working on. Emily, what’s on your to-do list?

[00:39:30] Emily: Well, putting away those darn decorations. Hate putting them up. Hate taking them down. I am going to leave up my glitter houses. I think I, lately I’ve kept them up for most of January and I think I’m going to keep my tree up but without the decorations, like the ornaments, for a few more weeks because I need all that light that I can get in January.

But there are things, you know, the advent calendars can come off the wall and, and, you know. put away the Christmas dishes and things like that. So what’s on your to do list, Heidi?

[00:40:01] Heidi: Well, I also need to make a big jump on the decorations and get those taken down. Yeah, I’m just going to take it a bit at a time and not stress too much about it. I really like my Christmas decorations. They’re so cute. So I want to enjoy them as long as I can. It’ll reach a point there where I’m like, okay.

This is too much,

[00:40:19] Emily: Yeah.

[00:40:21] Heidi: but I’m not there yet. And

[00:40:22] Emily: you know you’re ready.

[00:40:23] Heidi: yes, exactly. And I also need to finish my reflection journal. I tend to kind of pick at it over the month of January is things settle in my brain or new memories come up. So I like to work at it over time

[00:40:35] Emily: Yeah. I need to do that too.

[00:40:39] Heidi: to wrap up the show. We are sharing our nice list. Emily, what is on your nice list?

[00:40:43] Emily: Well, I’m putting you on my nice list, Heidi, because You have been so great in the recent Christmases with helping plan out a neighbor gift that we can give to all of our neighbors. So we have, we live close to each other, but we have different neighbors. And Heidi has really taken the lead on planning something really unique and creative for us to do.

So, Each year and I help a little, but mostly she’s the one that makes it happen and it saves me so much stress. And also it’s so fun to like have something unique to give out to the neighbors and like have the fun of like hearing what everybody thinks about it. So you picked a particularly fun idea for this year and started it super early and we executed it all year long because it involved a lot of different plans that had to fall into place.

I know. Are we going to talk about this on the podcast? What it is.

[00:41:37] Heidi: I mean, we can’t, I don’t know, we don’t have an episode scheduled for it.

[00:41:42] Emily: know if we were going to work it in somewhere of like, I don’t know what though. So maybe, maybe I’ll just share it here. So we put together a Christmas themed pass the pigs game basically and it was called, well, wait, what did we call it? Oh

[00:41:56] Heidi: Oh dear, dad was set on that name.

[00:41:58] Emily: Yes, because our dad helped us with this. So he 3d printed two reindeer For each gift we were giving out and we had to test all these different prints of reindeer to find the perfect size and and weight that when we rolled them they would land in different positions like the past the pigs game and then we came up with a little scoring system to keep track of depending how they land is how you do your points and We put them in these cute little jars I mean it just turned out really cute and fun And I’ve already heard from friends that Their kids are loving it that they’re taking it with them to a restaurant when they go out and things like that So it turned out super cute.

It was a really unique idea and you made it happen. So You are on the nice

[00:42:47] Heidi: Well, thanks for being my partner in crime on that. That was, but I definitely wouldn’t have done it if it was just for me. So it was motivating to have your

[00:42:55] Emily: even more people who get to enjoy your brilliant What’s on your nice list, Heidi?

[00:43:01] Heidi: Well, Emily, I’m putting you on my nice list.

[00:43:03] Emily: Wait, what?

[00:43:04] Heidi: discuss

[00:43:06] Emily: you wrote in the outline!

[00:43:08] Heidi: So just Emily and to all the moms out there who are the magic makers, I know that I know better than anyone who doesn’t have kids can know how much work goes into what you do for your loved ones. I know all of the billion decisions, the worries, the stresses, everything you’re considering that goes into making the holidays magic.

And. Like just, I want to give everyone hugs. I can give you a hug, Emily, but I mean, it gets to the, we’re not in the same room in person, but I just know it’s so much work for the special people you love and it matters. It matters even if no one thinks you. And so like, good job and keep doing what you’re doing.

It’s, it’s important.

[00:43:57] Emily: Yes, go magic makers!

[00:43:59] Heidi: That’s it for today’s episode. Get started on your own holiday reflection while your memories are fresh. And don’t forget this week’s get ahead tip for writing your holiday ta da list.

Thanks for tuning in today. Use this week to get a head start on planning for what’s ahead. And remember, don’t get it perfect, get it going. Come follow along on Instagram at theholidayheadstart. We would love to hear from you. If you liked this episode, head to Apple Podcasts and leave us a review. We’ll see you here next week.