Our 4 Tried and True Tricks to Reset a Rough Day of School [episode 176]

Emily  0:00

Hey there. Thanks for joining us today. You know those days where everything seems to be going wrong, the kids are hyped up from the latest snowstorm, the whole class is struggling to focus, and you are at your wit’s end. Those days can be so rough, and it’s tricky to know how to handle it.

Heidi  0:21

A few months ago, our friend Kelsey from the Educate & Rejuvenate podcast interviewed us, and we shared our four tried and true tricks for resetting a rough day of school. Coming back from winter break, you might need these tips frequently, so we wanted to share that great conversation here for you today on our podcast.

Emily  0:21

And if you like what you like what you hear, you should check out the Educate and Rejuvenate podcast with Kelsey as well.

Kelsey Sorenson  1:19

You know those days when the kids are going absolutely crazy and you are going a little crazy too, and you’re like, how am I possibly going to make it through this day? We’ve all been there.

Kelsey Sorenson  1:30

So today I have my good friends, Heidi and Emily from Teacher Approved podcast and Second Story Window. They are two teacher sisters who really know their stuff, and I’m excited to have them back on the podcast again.

Kelsey Sorenson  1:42

They are going to share their four tricks that are going to help you reset even the roughest day. And I have to say, tip number four is my absolute favorite. So make sure that you tune in all the way to the end. Welcome to Educate and Rejuvenate the podcast. Four tricks to reset a rough day of school. Let’s go you.

Kelsey Sorenson  2:03

Welcome to Educate and Rejuvenate the podcast. I am so thrilled that you’re here, whether you were a long time listener or first time listener, a new listener. I’m so thrilled that you have hit play on this episode and made all the way through the intro and you’re still listening. This is a good one. So glad you’re here.

Kelsey Sorenson  3:03

Without further ado, let’s dive into today’s episode. It’s an incredible interview with my friends Emily and Heidi from Second Story Window. I just love them. This is their second or third time on the podcast. I’m so happy to have them back, so I’m not going to do a formal intro, because they kind of talk about themselves too, but they are just amazing. You need to follow them if you’re not already.

Kelsey Sorenson  3:21

So we are talking about the four tricks to reset a rough day at school. Like I’m raising my hand that I need that right? These reminders were so good, and whenever they were like, saying their answers, I just found myself, like, wanting to jump in and be like, Oh yes, I so agree with that, and it really goes along with a lot of what we’re talking about here, but doing it with the students, and I love it so much. So I just want to get right to this interview. Let’s go.

Kelsey Sorenson  3:51

Heidi, Emily, I’m so thrilled to have both of you here back on Educate and Rejuvenate the podcast. It’s been a little bit and I can not wait to chat today.

Emily  4:00

Hi. Thank you so much for having us on the show, Kelsey. For those of your listeners who don’t know us, I’m Emily.

Heidi  4:09

And I am Heidi.

Emily  4:11

We are two sisters and former classroom teachers who love to help other teachers elevate what matters and simplify the rest.

Heidi  4:21

We are so excited to talk to you today about how to reset a rough day of school. Like probably all of you, we have lived through our fair share of bad days in the classroom. So we want to share some tips about what has worked for us and also the hard lessons we’ve learned of what not to do.

Kelsey Sorenson  4:42

I love this topic so much, and I’m so glad that you brought it to the show today, because all of us have definitely had those days. I had them in the classroom. I have them now with homeschooling my own children, it can be so hard to get back on track, sometimes, especially with all the emotions that we feel, and I know we’re going to be talking about that.

Kelsey Sorenson  4:59

So I feel like this topic is perfect, because not only is it like classroom management and dealing with children, but it really does tie into a lot of what we talk about here with coaching as well. Super thrilled to be talking about this today.

Kelsey Sorenson  5:11

The first question that I have for you is, why do you think it’s so tempting to slog through to the bell on tough days rather than take a moment to reset.

Emily  5:21

Well, for starters, we’re all really tired, so tired, so it feels a lot easier to just ride the wave to the end of the day. Sometimes it feels like that would be easier, and getting through the rest of the day sometimes is all you can do. That’s all you can personally handle, is just slogging through to the end.

Heidi  5:44

But I think we sometimes discount how much energy it actually takes to slog through to the end. It’s not a direct path to go just to make it through to the end of the day. It’s still really draining to put up with all of the things that are going wrong in your classroom.

Heidi  6:01

It is actually maybe worth it to put in that effort to try and salvage the day, even if you were in the last 45 minutes of the day, it is probably still worth it to put in some energy to try and just regroup and get everything back on track, even though, dang, you are tired.

Kelsey Sorenson  6:17

So tired, right? That’s my teacher tired is a big thing you see all the time on Instagram. We have a lot going on. But like you said, even though it might be the path of least resistance to just keep slogging through the day, it actually is harder, right? It’s kind of like we need to choose our heart. Is that? Like, do we want the heart of having to slog through the day, or the heart of, okay, let’s take a moment. Let’s consciously do something to reset.

Kelsey Sorenson  6:17

So we’re going to talk about how we can do that today. So I’m really excited about that. So the next question, a lot of time. So the next question, a lot of times, we’re having a tough day, but we’re like, Oh no, I need to make sure I get through all this stuff, and if I take a moment to reset, what am I going to do?

Kelsey Sorenson  6:55

So the next question, what tips do you have for balancing the immediate needs of the classroom, especially when you’re having a rough day with the long term curriculum goals?

Heidi  7:03

As a teacher, I have played that mental game. I don’t know if tennis is the right analogy of the back and forth by word of like, I need to stop and regroup and redo this. But also, time is ticking, and we have to hit the math lesson done, because we have to get the science lesson done. Because if we get behind on these things, then like, I’m going to be extra behind. And I have you know how the math trying to figure out, like, every minute in this day has to account for something, because there’s just so much that has to get done.

Heidi  7:33

But if we are trying to push through and teach kids who are out of sync with what is happening in the classroom, what we’re trying to do. It’s not like they are learning anyway, so all you’re doing is checking things off your list, but you’re not actually accomplishing anything. Oh, so true.

Heidi  7:50

So you’re left with that choice between re teaching a whole lesson tomorrow, or down the road because they didn’t get what you were teaching today, or you can stop for 10 or 15 minutes and reset and regroup. If you look at it that way, you’re actually saving time by stopping and correcting the energy imbalance that has risen in your classroom.

Emily  8:13

Right. It’s like taking the time to teach procedures really well at the beginning of the year, that if you take that time, that feels like I need to be getting into curriculum, but you take the time at the beginning of the year, you save time long term. Well, that same principle applies here on these tough days.

Kelsey Sorenson  8:30

Yes, this is the same thing I’ve been preaching to especially for those who’ve been listening to the podcast or especially if you’ve read my new book, educate and rejuvenate. I talk about consciously creating a schedule and setting aside your time and actually setting aside time to figure out your schedule. And a lot of times, teachers are like, Well, how do I find time for that?

Kelsey Sorenson  8:48

But really it’s more like, how do I not find time for that? Because it really is a time saver in the long run. So this principle is the exact same thing. It’s the same thing with our students, like when they’re having a rough time, or our own children, again. If you’re working with your kids at home like we can take that moment to reset, and in the long run, it is going to help us to make it further right, to be able to teach them from a regulated place, from a place where we can actually make stuff happen. So I love this.

Kelsey Sorenson  9:17

What are some common signs that a classroom day is off or heading in the wrong direction. So how come we know Okay, now is maybe the time that we need to stop and reset?

Emily  9:26

Well, the first clue is often the noise level. So if you start feeling like your class is getting a lot louder than usual, that’s a pretty good clue, that you are heading off in the wrong direction.

Heidi  9:39

And often you might find that like things that normally run well, like maybe centers did great yesterday, and suddenly you’re having all these little hiccups, and kids are wandering and things aren’t getting done and materials are being misused.

Heidi  9:52

That should trigger your little teacher antenna should be going out to be like, is this a situation where the kids don’t know what to do? Or is this a situation where the day is going off the rails? Because your response to those two things is probably going to be different.

Heidi  10:07

If it’s a question of the kids not understanding the expectations, you can re explain what you expect them to do, maybe model it a little more, and everything’s gonna get back on track. If it’s a question of the energy in the class going in an unproductive direction. You might have to do a little more. It’s going to be a little, loosey goosey, less checklisty things, but we do have a few clear tips that you can use to apply to these moments when all of the little chicks are running all over the farm yard, and you gotta get them back in play.

Kelsey Sorenson  10:39

It really can feel that way sometimes, how we’re just chasing all these chicks in a million different directions, and it’s like, What on earth am I supposed to do with all these different kids meeting different things, and I’m also supposed to get through this curriculum. And then sometimes that leads us to again, maybe get dysregulated, or maybe think thoughts like, Oh, my goodness, I just can’t do this, or whatever. That causes us to feel overwhelmed, that caused us to feel stressed, that caused stress, that caused us to feel anxiety.

Kelsey Sorenson  11:04

What do we do when we feel like our classroom climate, what’s going on in the room, is just too overwhelming? We feel like, Oh, what am I supposed to do here? Like with myself, with the students?

Emily  11:16

Well, we love a list, especially a list that all starts with the same letter. So how we remember the four things that you can do to turn around your bad day is the four C’s, so change, connect, create, and center, and you may need to do a combination of these things.

Heidi  11:39

Now, of course, they all start with C, but it’s just, I gotta say, it annoys me that the English language is such that they all start with C, and there’s all kinds of different C sounds. It’s true. We can only do so much the way English is.

Kelsey Sorenson  11:54

What I do love about it, though, is that it helps us to remember, right? Okay, the four C’s. That’s amazing. So tell me about the first one. How can we use change to help reset the day?

Heidi  12:02

A handy little way to remember this is to do a change of place or a change of pace. So if your kids are at their desks and the work’s not getting done and they’re talking to each other and they’re fighting over pencils and crayons or whatnot, you could try changing the place. Have everyone come to the rug for a different activity as a change of pace, doing work in a new place is suddenly going to feel like a treat, something special.

Heidi  12:02

You can also do it the opposite way. If you have an activity where kids are supposed to be working small groups, and the climate in the class is just getting a little out of control. Small groups might be too big. You can cut it down into partners, so there’s less opportunity for goofing off. Or if kids are working in partners, and that’s still too much of a excuse to get off track, you could turn the activity into an individual project, so kids are working on their own or at their desks.

Heidi  13:03

So changing place, you could also do a lesson in an unusual spot. If you always do read aloud in one spot of the room, maybe try doing it at a different place of the room. Or if you really want to change the place, you could go out to somewhere else in the school you go out to the playground. How excited would your class be to get to do math on the playground one day?

Heidi  13:22

Now that could have the opposite effect of making kids more hyper instead of calming them down, if that’s your goal. So you know, use wisely.

Emily  13:30

Yes, this is a powerful tool, so you have to wield it well and know which thing would make the most sense in the current situation based on what specifically is not going well in the moment.

Heidi  13:43

Besides a change of place, you can also do a change of pace, meaning switch up your activities. So if you’re doing centers and it’s not going well, switch to having kids work at their desks on worksheets, because that’s what they can handle right then. Or if kids are too drained and they’re not getting things done, you know, like a spring afternoon where your room is hot and they’re all wilting, change things up and do something a little more active, or try doing something as a whole group.

Heidi  14:12

Changing the pace can inject some energy in the room, or it can drain some of the excess energy, depending, again, like change of place, depending on how you use that tool to meet the needs of your class that day.

Kelsey Sorenson  14:22

Look at you with your use of the English language and all of this. I love change of place, change of pace, again, super easy to remember. But I do think that these things are going to be so helpful, because switching it up really makes things exciting again for the kids might re engage them, gets their brains activated again, instead of being in the same old, same old. So I love this idea. I think it is a great way to reset. And like, it’s very conscious, because you have to be okay, what change am I going to make? So I love this.

Kelsey Sorenson  14:49

Okay, the next C is connection. And I think this is so important. And I talk about this a lot of times in coaching too, that, and we even said you need to connect before you correct, right? A big part of teaching is connecting with the kids. But I want to hear what do you have to say about this? How can teachers use connection to re engage students during those overwhelming moments?

Emily  15:09

One of the best things you can do if what your class is needing is connection is a group activity. And there’s a million things you could do as a group activity, but that’s a good one to have in your back pocket. So group activity is a great way to get grounded and help everyone come together as a class.

Emily  15:26

And you can do something productive for your group activity, like writing kind notes for the office assistants, or maybe something productive like going outside to clean up the playground and return the random balls that are out there, or something like that. Those sort of activities can be a change of pace or a change of place, as well as a connecting activity.

Heidi  15:51

Yeah, it’s really powerful for kids to get to participate in something that has a measurable benefit to other people. You kind of get that helpers high, and that can be a powerful way to reset the energy in your classroom, if things are if you’re all facing a rough day.

Heidi  16:06

But an activity doesn’t have to be that big to have the power of resetting. You could call everyone in to the rug and share a story. That’s one I’ve mentioned several times already in this podcast, because it’s such a powerful way to reset. You’re sharing this community, this space together, and you’re having this shared experience where you’re all, you know the way you want to watch movies with a friend, because it’s creates this shared experience. So this is just a mini, tiny version of that when you’re reading a book aloud.

Emily  16:06

Yeah, a read aloud at the carpet is the go to for connection, for sure.

Heidi  16:38

And this is especially helpful if you can choose, like just a fun book that you can enjoy together. But we love The Book with No Pictures by BJ Novak, that’s just like Kid humor at an 11 because laughing together is just such a powerful tool for connection.

Kelsey Sorenson  16:54

Oh, my goodness, yes, I so agree with this. In fact, in my book, Educate and Rejuvenate, I talk about seven ways that we can complete the stress cycle that came from the research from Emily and Amelia Nagoski. And a lot of times when we have a rough class, it’s actually a lot of dysregulation, both with our students and with ourselves. And laughter is one of the seven ways we can do that.

Kelsey Sorenson  17:15

Laughter and connection, and you’re getting two in one with that when you’re reading funny books or telling jokes or just laughing together. So another thing that’s come up a lot in coaching with teachers and parents is accountability with kids, like getting kids to actually take some ownership, right of turning around the day and their own behavior and their part in this rough day. So how can you help students and encourage them to take ownership of helping to make that shift during a difficult day?

Emily  17:43

Probably my go to strategy on a really rough day of school really leans on connection. And what I do is I bring everybody to the carpet and we have a class meeting, and so we discuss how the day is going. I ask them how they think it’s going. I share any concerns that I have about what’s happening in our classroom that day, and then I involve them in the discussion about what we’re going to do to fix it.

Emily  18:10

So we talk about what they can do to help turn the day around, and you’ll be surprised at the good suggestions that they will have to fix the problem, and they’re going to be so much more invested in changing their behavior and helping write the school day onto the right course. Again, when they’re part of the solution, being part of the solution really helps those kids feel connected as a class, and it helps them have a personal sense of ownership over what’s going on in the classroom and what can be done to help.

Heidi  18:10

And I think having a meeting about, or at least a discussion about, what’s going on and what needs to change can also help make kids aware of the problem a lot of times. You know, kids, kids are a bit oblivious. If you haven’t noticed, yeah, they’re very much in their own little worlds. That’s part of being a kid.

Heidi  19:11

So when we can help call attention to what is going wrong, it helps open their eyes to what is happening around them and how they can be helping solve that problem going forward. It’s just another way to give them tools to be problem solvers, instead of always needing direction on the next steps that they should be taking.

Kelsey Sorenson  19:30

I love the idea of a meeting of actually being very upfront and pointing it out, because, like you said, children can be so oblivious. As a parent and a teacher, I have definitely seen that, so I love this so much. Okay, so we’ve talked about change, we’ve talked about connection. So what role does creating play in resetting a tough day?

Emily  19:50

Any kind of creative activity will work here so that could be guided drawing activities, which can be a good way to bring the level down in your class if things are getting a little chaotic, or you could have them build something together or maybe individually. So doing brain breaks together is one of our favorite ways to create some fun in the classroom, or singing a silly song.

Emily  20:18

This is something I always share about when I was in the classroom, when I was really fed up with my class and they were just making me crazy. I would have them do that too deta song, because they looked so silly, and I would laugh so hard that I would just fall in love with them again, and they would get all their laughter out, and we’d all have such a fun, memorable time together. So I would save doing that song for really rough moments only.

Heidi  20:49

It’s so smart to have a backup like that that you can just pull out in those tough moments. If you don’t have a favorite song, or if you need a backup to de da, having a joke book in your class is a great way to just share some fun with your class. The dumber the joke that funnier the kids think it is. So the easiest audience you’ll ever have. So just reading a few jokes together can really go a long way.

Emily  21:16

Yeah because laughing together is such a great way to change everyone’s mood, and that alone can just turn the whole day around.

Heidi  21:23

And another avenue for fun is probably your kid’s favorite, and that is to give an extra recess. Even if it’s only just a mini recess in the class and you get out the inside recess games, or you all just play heads up, seven up, really quick. Or my favorite is lazy lions. This is such a good game, because the kids have to be quiet.

Heidi  21:44

So if you don’t know lazy lions, I’ve heard different versions of this, but we played, this is the version that was taught to me. So I taught my class. So one kid is the lion tamer, everyone else is a lion. And what do lions do? They sleep. So kids gonna have to spread out around the room, and they have to find a place to sleep. I didn’t make them close to their eyes, but the rule was they could breathe and blink, but otherwise they have to be completely still.

Heidi  22:05

And of course, with kids, you have to have those rules, because, you know, kids will get you on technicalities every time. So they could anyway. So then the lion tamer walks around and be like, Oh, Ryan, I see you moved your foot, and I made them again. Kids on technicalities. I made them say what they part of the body we saw moving, because otherwise the kids are how they move. And then I’d have to have a talk about you sometimes move and you don’t even know anyway, kids, aren’t they delightful.

Heidi  22:34

So the lion tamer say, oh, Ryan, your foot moved. Now, Ryan hops up. Now we have two lion tamers, and they go around trying to catch all the other lions moving. And then I think the idea is to wait till you have your last lion, and that becomes the next lion tamer. I didn’t wait that long. I wait till I waited till there were like, three or four kids left, and once 16 other kids are yelling at them, and you’re like, Okay, everybody up. Let’s start over. Let’s play a new round.

Heidi  22:56

Or you can just move on. At that point, like you’ve had a little break, you’ve had some fun together, you’re connecting. This is all three of those C’s, right together, the 3c we’re talking about so far, right? We’ve changed something, we’re creating some fun, and we’re connecting. That’s magic, right there for resetting a rough day.

Kelsey Sorenson  23:13

l love this. Like these opportunities for creativity and fun and getting up and moving. All of these are ways that we regulate, too. So it’s just perfect. It really ties into a lot of what we’ve been talking about to do for ourselves, but we need to do this with our kids too. I love getting out the music. I love playing games. Love all of these tips. Okay, so the final one we haven’t talked about yet is centering, which is something I totally love. I want to hear. How can centering help reset a tough day?

Heidi  23:41

Well, maybe we should have started with centering, because it is so important and so effective. So when I’m thinking of centering, I’m thinking of calming, grounding, just getting back in that plane where you’re in control of your body, instead of your emotions running the show. And this is probably more important on days where the day is rough because the kids are hyper than it is on days where it might be rough for other reasons.

Heidi  23:43

But if your kids are pushing all your buttons, I think the first thing to do as a centering tool is as the teacher to recognize how you’re feeling that you got that tightness in your chest and your shoulders are tight, and you’re about to lose it, right? The first thing is just to pause and breathe as the teacher.

Heidi  24:08

We need to create some space so the rational part of your brain can catch up with the panicking part of your brain, because otherwise the panicking part of your brain loves to call the shots. We don’t need her calling the shots. And then once you have calmed yourself a little bit, invite your students to pause and breathe as well.

Heidi  24:45

When I taught second grade, we would do this at least twice day. I always did at the end of morning meeting, and then anytime during the day when we needed just a little bit of regrouping and I had a predictable set of instructions that I always gave because I wanted my students brains to start to connect the verbal cue with calming down.

Heidi  25:04

So I said something like, sit up straight, take a deep breath in and feel the air get all the way into your lungs. Slow breath out. Rest your hands in your lap, or let them or down by your sides. Look down at the floor, close your eyes. I didn’t expect my students. I wanted them to close their eyes because that is more calming, but also, like some kids just are not going to feel safe closing their eyes in a room full of people. So I didn’t make that a mandatory. They could just look down on the ground.

Heidi  25:32

And then it was, take a deep breath in, long breath out. Keep breathing slowly. I’ll mind the time, and I’ll let you know when we’re finished. And so then I’d give them anywhere from 30 seconds to 90 seconds, and we had to work up to 90 seconds. So don’t feel bad if you have to start at five seconds in your class, but they can develop that.

Heidi  25:53

And I actually had a student at the end of the year once, and if you had asked, I would have said this was the kid that needed at least because it was when my kids was always on top of it and getting things done. But he specifically thanked me for help teaching him how to breathe, because it had helped him so much with his anxiety in other areas, like because he was playing baseball.

Heidi  26:12

Oh, okay, it really does matter to give tools for managing stress in their lives and when the day is rough, that’s what it was, because we’re stressed, either we’re to have too much energy or not enough energy, or energy going in the wrong directions, right? We just need to refocus and stopping and breathing is such a powerful tool for that.

Heidi  26:32

And you can add to that with a change of place by having everyone stand up and do some gentle stretching. Or if you know some yoga, or you could put on, I know they have tons of kids yoga videos. I would just always recommend previewing anything before you show it to your class, because, yes, we don’t want to end up on the evening news for having shown something that was inappropriate.

Heidi  26:52

If my class really needed a reset, and stretching and breathing wasn’t going to cut it. Sometimes I would turn out the lights, and I always warn them ahead of time, because you know, if you turn the lights off on, kids, they all start yelling. I can hear this, yes, right now, but I would let them know, rest your head on your desk. I would turn up the lights and play a soft song.

Heidi  27:11

And this is my favorite song for this is called Asleep The Snow Came Flying. It’s an instrumental song with clarinet. I don’t know. It’s just almost like a drug to my sensory system. It’s so calming. Sometimes I would do a guided meditation with my class. I had a book of kids meditations that worked really well.

Heidi  27:30

So getting centered like that is really such a powerful way to use the body to help adjust the energy that is coming from the mind. Right when we can get kids centered, grounded, pulled back into their bodies a little bit, it can help refocus the energy in the room. It just the climate in the classroom so that you can have a peaceful, happy, productive day.

Kelsey Sorenson  27:53

Meditation and yoga have been such powerful tools for me, for my kids, as well, with when we need to center such a good way to tune back in, feel what’s going on in your body. And the great thing is, it’s an opportunity for you to do it, like you mentioned. We need to do it too, and our kids and doing it together. I love putting on peaceful music or even nature sounds. Those have been proven to really help calm our bodies, calm the nervous system and all of that. Oh, this is so good.

Kelsey Sorenson  28:19

Centering is such a necessary tool as teachers. I feel like so much of this stuff we’re talking about today is what we should have learned in college, but maybe didn’t when we were all learning how to become teachers, or even just parents. We need to know this.

Kelsey Sorenson  28:30

And if you’re not sure where to start with doing yoga with your kids, Giselle from kids yoga stories is going to be on the podcast next week, so stay tuned. Make sure you’re subscribed, or if you’re listening to this later, just listen on to the next episode. It will tie right into this one. So I love it.

Kelsey Sorenson  28:46

Another question, so what do you do about environmental factors, like, for example, a full moon? I just posted some memes on Instagram last week when we had the Hunters Moon, the full moon, the brightest, biggest one in all of 2024 and it got, like, over 5000 likes and almost 4000 shares, because everybody is like, oh my gosh, this moon is insane. Kids behavior is insane.

Kelsey Sorenson  29:07

And even for me, my five year old woke up all through the night. He doesn’t do that anymore, but it was the night of the full moon. I’m like, oh my goodness, there’s something to this. But anyways, also an upcoming break, like holiday breaks coming up, or Halloween, right? Oh my goodness, what do you do about these things that impact classroom dynamics, and how do you adapt to them?

Emily  29:26

The good thing is that if you can predict it, you can plan for it in advance, and there are many disruptions that you can see coming from a mile away. So for example, you know that the last few days before winter break are not going to be your most productive. Those are going to be very disruptive in your classroom.

Emily  29:45

You can also probably predict that Halloween, or the day before or after Halloween, is probably going to be chaotic. And yeah, if you know the full moon is coming, any experienced teacher will tell you that that is going to impact your students if there’s a full moon. So if you just know in advance that those things are coming, you can have a plan for what you’re going to do when they inevitably lose it.

Heidi  30:13

Yeah, you know it’s coming, so you might as well just have that already in your plans for you know, the day before Halloween, we’re not going to do centers, because I know they won’t be able to handle that. So we’re going to change our plans and we’re going to do more individual work at desks just to head off that chaos.

Heidi  30:32

But unfortunately, you cannot always predict what will set your class off. My second grade classroom didn’t have any windows in it. I know right. Tell me about it, but somehow I could always predict when an incoming storm arrived, because that change in barometric pressure would make my class way more squirrely.

Heidi  30:53

But I couldn’t know that that was necessarily coming too far in advance. So it’s smart to have a bag of tricks that you can turn to in those rough moments. We talked about how Emily saved two detail for those rough moments. You could have the joke book on hand or fun read alouds. If you want you could try preparing a playlist of calming music.

Emily  31:12

Or a playlist of brain break videos you like, or things like that.

Heidi  31:17

Just knowing that you have some things that you can fall back on can really help you as a teacher in that moment when, again, we know you are so tired and these kids are being so naughty.

Heidi  31:30

But you don’t have to make decisions. You don’t have to rack your brain for an idea, because you already you’ve seen this coming, even if you couldn’t know that a fire drill was going to derail your entire day that day, because you have prepared for this moment in advance by having a few tools that you could just pull out whenever you need them.

Kelsey Sorenson  31:51

Yes, I feel like this is another one of those things where we can really prepare ahead of time more than we think, even when it’s an unprepared situation, kind of like how we want to have a sub tub ready to go for when we might need to call in a sub at the last minute, right? You have plans ready to go. Same thing, having a joke book on hand, having a playlist ready. Or those videos can be a way where you’re like, Okay, I know what to do.

Kelsey Sorenson  32:09

And especially if you are like in the emotions and everything, you have a routine, you have a system, so you don’t have to figure it out when your brain or your body isn’t in the best state to be problem solving. You’ve already made that decision ahead of time. So I love this so much. Next question is, do you see a difference? And what do you do about a day that starts off rough, like from the get go, versus one that maybe starts fine, but starts to go off the rails?

Emily  32:32

If I have a day that starts rough, probably my first line of defense is just going to be revisiting expectations and procedures, because I know that I need to lean into structure, because if they’re starting to get overwhelmed, it’s like the kindling waiting for a fire. I don’t want that kindling to turn into a metaphorical blaze later on in the day.

Emily  32:56

And so I can often get the day going in the right direction just by revisiting those expectations and procedures early in the day and getting everyone back on track. But if it’s starting to get rough later in the day, I’m gonna lean more on those 4 C’s to help refocus everybody and get us back on track.

Kelsey Sorenson  33:15

Yes, I do think when it’s a bit later in the day, sometimes it can feel a little more tricky. It’s when, especially if it’s after lunch, is when everybody’s a little tired, a little ready for a break, and so that is when, yeah, those 4 C’s you might need a little more than just revisiting expectations. We might need to do all of those. So I love that we’ve been able to review them today.

Kelsey Sorenson  33:33

So you all know, if you’ve been listening to this podcast, how I feel about us as teachers, paying attention to our own feelings, our own thoughts, everything that’s going on for ourselves. So we can be the best teacher we can be. But I want to hear from you too. So Emily and Heidi, why is it so important for teachers to recognize and honor their own feelings, their own emotions during these difficult days?

Heidi  33:53

I think, as we’ve all learned, teaching will ring everything from you if you let it. And my hand is up, I am first in line for being guilty of this where I just push past my own exhaustion and shove down my own frustration, because there’s so much that has to get done. I don’t have time to process and take care of what I need.

Heidi  34:16

Because when you start to ignore your needs, you end up having less and less to give each day, and that’s how you burn out when you’re left with nothing left to give because you’ve not taken the time to recognize what you need on a difficult day. And that difficult days take a toll, it’s okay to be tired and it’s okay to need something more after you have just dealt with those little darlings who pushed every last button. Doesn’t make you a bad teacher. It doesn’t take away from the value of what you have to offer your class.

Heidi  34:50

But if we’re not stopping to really recognize that, yeah, today was hard. Here’s what I’m going to do tomorrow to take care of that, and here’s what I’m going to do now to take care of me, right? That’s why we just get to the end of the day at the end of the week. You know how it gets on Friday afternoons where you just, you’re, you’re crawling to your car because you’re so tired. We want to be able to stop that trajectory. We want to stop that pattern from taking so much from us.

Kelsey Sorenson  35:19

Yes, that crawling to your car, feeling that I am just so overwhelmed. I feel like I’m about to fall over that, like I can’t I just go from teacher to mom or dad or to whatever, one thing after the next, go, go, go. It is a lot, and we need to take care of ourselves. But the problem is so many teachers aren’t, and I’m with you. We need to stop that trajectory. We need to change that trajectory while we still can, we need a change of pace for us as teachers too, right?

Kelsey Sorenson  35:46

And that is why we’re here. That’s why we’re talking about this today. That’s why this podcast and your podcast exists. So we can help teachers to stop this, and that’s why I wrote a whole book about it, too. So really, we need to stop it. We need to just take care of ourselves. We deserve it. So the last question is, what are some strategies that teachers can use to care for themselves after a rough day at school?

Emily  36:12

I think the first and probably most important thing you need to do is leave work at work. Disconnect from all of your stress and worries for the class today, and just get out of there as soon as you can and tuck away all of your worries for today. You need to just, you need to disconnect sometimes, and just, you’ll deal with work again when you get there tomorrow. Your job is not your whole life. Don’t let it become your whole life, and take that disconnect that you deserve.

Heidi  36:44

I think it’s also really important, after leaving work on a rough day, to find something that can refill your bucket. Spend time doing something you love, something relaxing, spend time with the people that fill you up, so that you have something that you can give back to, so that you have some energy in your tank to face the next day.

Emily  37:03

And also remember that one bad day in the classroom is just part of the process of being a teacher, and it doesn’t define you as a teacher. It doesn’t mean that you are not a good teacher. It doesn’t necessarily mean you hate your job if you come home and you’re like, that was the worst day ever. That is all just part of this, and it doesn’t have to mean anything other than today was a rough day.

Heidi  37:26

And I think we also have to recognize that rough days are just part of life with children, and it’s just being a human, yes, in a system that we don’t get to control. So one thing that can be useful is just when you’re in those rough days to recognize that there are hundreds and hundreds of teachers who are also having a terrible day of teaching.

Heidi  37:48

And that you can make a plan in advance for what to do when those rough days hit, so that you’re not left scrambling or scrounging or just pushing through to the end. Actually have some tools that you can pull out and fall back on without needing to add more work at a time when you’re already so tired.

Kelsey Sorenson  38:08

I love what you shared about just accepting the day for what it is. That’s something I’ve been really practicing lately is a concept called radical acceptance, or surrendering, just realizing that this is how it is and this is how I feel about it. Sometimes I have these feelings, like, we have all the feelings, right? And just being like, yeah, today’s a rough day. Other teachers in the world are having a rough day too. It’s okay to have a rough day. Sometimes, this is just part of it. This is normal.

Kelsey Sorenson  38:32

That’s actually something in an Instagram where I just post with quoting Taylor Swift, even, like, even Taylor Swift has these right, these rough days we all do, right? So I think it’s just so important to remember that that we are all doing our best at any given time, and sometimes we have rough days, and then we’re going to have better days too. So that’s just something to always remember.

Kelsey Sorenson  38:52

And we can use all these tips, these strategies, though, to help turn those days around and learn from them, and possibly, like it can be a good thing, because then we have the opportunity to practice these 4 C’s so we can connect more with our students, so we can learn new strategies that then make it easier the next time. So can you review those 4c for us one last time to wrap this all up?

Heidi  39:14

Hopefully those 4 C’s can come in handy. Remember that a change, connection, creativity, and centering can help reset the roughest day.

Kelsey Sorenson  39:25

I love that such a beautiful way to sum this up, even the toughest day, we can turn it around with these tools. Thank you so much for being here on the podcast. Can you share a little bit about how our listeners, if they want to hear more from you, how they can follow you, where they can find you, etc?

Emily  39:42

That was such a fun conversation with you, Kelsey. Thank you so much for having us on your show. So fun to talk to you. If your listeners want to hear more from us, they can find us every week. They can find us every week on the Teacher Approved podcast.

Emily  39:57

And we also just started a new fun side project for anyone who feels stressed about planning the holiday season. Teacher or not, we just launched our new podcast called The Holiday Head Start, where we’re sharing how we’ve used the skills we learned as teachers to create the perfect planning system for calming the chaos in December. So we would love to have your listeners come find us on our pod, or they can also find us on Instagram and Facebook.

Kelsey Sorenson  40:24

I love it. You all need to follow Emily and Heidi on both of these podcasts. They are just awesome, and you can hear their sister banter and everything. I loved it in this episode today. Make sure that you follow them.

Kelsey Sorenson  40:34

And I’ve been so excited about this little side project they’ve been doing. I’ve been hearing about it for a whole year, since it was just like an idea. Emily and I, we send messages back and forth and stuff, and so it’s been fun to see this project come to fruition. So make sure to follow it. I can’t wait to learn some awesome things about the holiday season and making it less stressful as well. So so much fun.